Air
by Chibi-Ra-Chan
Summary: She's a captive, a pawn in a international war effort, but in this moment, under the ash tree, miles away from home, next to a boy that she has never actually seen, Sakura realizes that she is hopelessly in love with her captor. AU, ItaSaku, Complete
1. Part I: Ahisma

Air

Part I; Ahisma

By: Chibi Ra Chan

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Tragedy

Pairing: ItaSaku

---

Ahisma- The Hindu belief of non-violence, literally meaning, no victims.

"_And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye." _

_-The Little Prince, chapter 21_

"She's a little weirdo, Un." The voice despite being bright and bubbly was flat. She had never noticed these kinds of things before, but now, it seemed to be the only way she could tell what was going on. Even though the comment was obviously steered toward her, she did nothing.

Sakura just continued to sit and stare blindly ahead, in the most literal sense. She hadn't seen a single thing in three days.

There was silence before the sound of something, a pan fan maybe, connecting with a resounding 'fwap'. The quickly uttered 'ow' told her right away that the bubby voiced man had been hit. 'That's what he deserves! Dragging me away from my family, the nerve!' Her inner voice prodded, but still she said nothing.

"Don't forget that she's the child here Deidara, not you." Came a calm feminine tone. She thought the voice sounded like the smooth notes of the ocarina her nursemaid would play for her when she was younger, but refused to say so out loud." She's far away from home with people she doesn't know and can't see. I believe she has every right to be a little off if she wishes."

There was a sigh to her left, from Deidara, and then silence again. Distantly she heard the ringing of a wind chime being swayed in the early spring breeze. It was March, and her birthday would come in a few days time. She would be eleven, but there would be no grand party, no frilly dress, there would be no music or dancing or merrymaking at all.

Sakura would be sending her birthday with strangers.

"Where the hell is Itachi, Un? Isn't he supposed to be in charge of the brat?"

"He'll be returning soon, he is out to speak with leader."

"I don't like this whole thing Konan. I seems kind of cruel, un. She's a baby, too young to use as a hostage."

"I don't like it anymore then you do, but this is the quickest way."

"Still it's messed up yeah."

They were talking about her as if she wasn't here, as if she was just a pawn in a game. In a way that's what she was. They wouldn't call her by her name, just kid, or she, or child. She was more than that. She was more than just the President's daughter, she was a person too.

"It is one life versus thousands. We must make choices."

"I guess, isn't it a bit much to blind the kid?"

"It isn't permanent; when everything's done she'll see again."

"What the kid can't-"

"Sakura" The shuffling of what she guessed were paper doors was the only other clue that alerted all three of them to the prescience of another. Sakura looked around trying to hear where he was. "Her name is Sakura. She is not a thing. Stop referring to her as such."

"It's about time Itachi, what took you so long un?" The person, Itachi, did nothing to answer the question.

Still franticly looking around, she felt a palm rest on the top of her head. It was warm. Out of reflex she looked up and the slight shifting of shadows is the only thing that changes in her vision. It is frustrating, and she wants to smack the hand away, but doubts she could without her sight.

"What is the problem?" The same person asked again.

"She refuses to talk, or eat." The woman, Konan she had learned from listening, answered. The hand was removed and before she could react, she was lifted to her feet.

"Aren't you hungry Sakura?"

In the recesses of her mind, Sakura flustered up in anger. 'Does he think that just because he says my name I'll suddenly listen? Cha, not happening!'

So she says nothing, and does her best to glare in what she thinks is his general direction.

"Then you have no interest in eating?"

Still no answer.

"In that case-" She is lifted from the floor and is thrown carelessly over this Itachi person's shoulder. She is so shocked that she is unable to speak even if she had desired to do so. "We will put you to work then, that will fix your appetite problem."

Suddenly they are moving and the little issue Sakura had earlier about not speaking to the likes of her kidnappers is forgotten. "Put me down! Who do you think you are?! _Shannaro! _PUT ME DOWN!"

The last thing she hears before they leave the house is a soft laugh from Konan and the yelled out 'Don't go too far un.' from Deidara.

---

By the time he had stopped walking and set her down, Sakura had given up on screaming at the top of her lungs, it was no use, the boy carrying her didn't seem the least bit phased by her temper tantrum and didn't let her move and inch in his grip.

Back on her feet, she glared at the ground.

"Have you ever worked in a garden before Sakura?" the question was light and airy, and floated into her ears with no trouble. She didn't answer. "I will take that as a no." There was a shuffling sound, followed by the feeling of her hands being pried open from the fists at her side. She felt cool metal slide into her grip. "That is a shovel; feel free to dig around if you wish. You do know how to dig, yes?"

Sakura wanted to scream. "I'm not stupid." She seethed with anger, this wasn't fair! She wanted to be home right now! Not digging around in the dirt with some evil kidnapper! Still when the boy, Itachi, made no attempt to respond, she gave up with a sigh. "I can't do anything in this dress." Despite being only eleven, she glared (in the wrong direction) harder than anyone her age ever had. She was a very strange little creature this Haruno Sakura.

Knowing she wouldn't be able to see it, Itachi allowed himself to briefly roll his eyes. She had a valid point really, she couldn't do anything in the heavy red dress that she had worn for the last few days, and Konan would not return with her other garments for a few hours.

Being ever resourceful, Itachi quickly took in his surroundings, formulating a rather simple resolution to the little problem. Within a few moments Sakura's dress was clipped up with clothes pins and other assorted garden equipment. "There. This should hold until Konan gets back." He spoke dryly as he pulled a long sleeve up tucking it with the others into the pin at her shoulder.

Elbow still in his hand, Itachi noticed how very small she was. Sakura was a rake thin, and as pale as the flower she was named after. Had she never seen sunlight before? The thought was silly and he dismissed them, of course she seemed small she was four years his junior. Actually the last time he had seen someone remotely her size was two years ago when Sasu-

He stopped that train of thought as soon as it filtered into his head. He shouldn't dwell on thing he couldn't change, and Sakura's muttering helped to push the discerning thoughts away.

"Excuse me?" He said, not understanding the jumbled words.

Blushing lightly, for he still held her elbow tenderly, Sakura repeated her words. "I said, what kind of kidnapper works in a garden?"

Itachi thought about it. Really, it was a valid question. When one thought of taking possession of a child, one did not relate that to flowers and foliage. "My brother used to tease me about gardening. He said that it wasn't manly enough. Still, I find it calming." He surprised himself by bringing up his brother again. He rarley let thoughts of his family surface. But what he said had rung true. And Sakura found she agreed with him, there was something about the sweet smell in the air, the blowing wind and watch she thought was a blue sky that calmed her down from her ranting.

After moment, he added on. "What kind of girl that is named after a flower doesn't know how to garden?"

The little captives response was immediate, she puffed out with anger like a blowfish. It was entirely too silly and even the ever stoic Itachi found himself laughing lightly. Sakura on the other hand found this not so funny. "I hate my name. It's too girly, too sweet. I don't want to be compared to a stupid flower that dies after a week."

Idly she poked into the dirt with her bare foot, her fancy sandals dismissed when they began to pin up her dress. "That's the best part about Cherry Blossoms though. They are only around for a short time, dazzling you with their beauty and then they leave. I think the name suits you." He let go of her elbow, and it is still warm where he had touched it with his long fingers.

Sakura blushed a little because she was young, and he was an older boy with a pretty voice who had inadvertently called her beautiful. Konoha and her mother would be here soon, so why act like a baby and cry over something she had no control over? She'd be back home by the end of the week. Why not relax until then, like a rather unexpected vacation?

"So-…" she said looking in his direction, "What are we planting Itachi?"

---

Seven days quietly pass.

There weren't any hunger strikes or refusals to speak on Sakura's part, and for that the three of them were thankful. Whatever happened in the house had to be reported to the higher ups every other day, because only a few actually knew the location of the 'base' as they jokingly called it.

Akatsuki was nothing if not efficient. There was too much on the line for them to be anything other than that. So when on the third day, the leader of the organization comes to relay the reports, Sakura thought nothing of it. They had introduced her to their leader, a man named Pein that Sakura could already tell she didn't really like.

His voice was cloudy and rainy, but not in a pretty way, it was like sloshing mud, and she could feel his eyes glare into her non-seeing ones, almost taunting. Still, she smiled prettily and said that it was a shame she wouldn't be able to meet him again. Obviously Leaf had finally sent word of their rescue and it would only be a few hours before she was back home in her own bed. That was why the leader was here.

It had to be.

While Konan and Itachi talked things over with their leader, they left her in the care of Deidara, who was trying to show her the finer art of clay sculptures, in vain. "I can't see. How can you make art without your eyes?"

Deidara had to smile at this, she was a smart kid. He didn't much mind having her around; it was an improvement from Itachi that was for sure. And she understood that art had to be experienced with all the senses, for that alone the blond decided that Sakura wasn't such a little weirdo after all.

With nothing to do, the two found themselves staring at each other blankly. The silence became too much for the pair of excitable people and it was Sakura that broke it.

"Do you want to go into the truth room?"

He sent her a bewildered look. "What in the world does that mean yeah?"

The pinkette idly squished clay in her hands, rolling it into a ball only to squish it again. "That's what my mother would call it. We ask questions to each other, back and forth, and you have to answer truthfully, because you're in the truth room. But if you don't want to answer then you can leave the truth room and you forfeit your own questions. Is that okay?"

Deidara thought about it for a moment, what harm could it do? She'd be gone in a few hours anyway. "Alright Kiddo, let's try this yeah."

She smiled and it finally struck Deidara that it was possibly the first real smile she had ever given since she arrived here.

"Okay, so why didn't they let you into their little meeting?"

Damn, this girl played rough. The question stung a bit too, but he shrugged, forgetting she couldn't see it. "They don't trust me, at least Pein doesn't. I've only been with the Akatsuki for a year now; some of the others have been in here since they were kids yeah. I only joined because my town was destroyed by a conflict between sound and leaf." Quickly he flipped the tables on her. "Why don't you ever get all snippy with Itachi like you do to me?"

Her light green eyes rolled, in a very un-eleven year old fashion. "What's the point? Nothing fazes him. It's a waste of energy."

Deidara muttered a quiet agreement and waited for her next question. It took a minute, but unlike her last question this one came out shy and unsure. "What-? She trailed off but tried again. "What does Itachi look like? You guys too." She added the 'you guys too' as an afterthought.

The would be artist grinned boyishly. 'I do believe that our little captive has a crush un.' "Well, there's no other way to say this than to say it. The Uchiha is horribly horribly disfigured yeah." He watched as her little heart shaped face dropped but quickly turned into a look of fury when she figured out that he was messing with her.

She chucked her clay at him. "You! You! You're lying! If you're only going to tease me then I don't want to be in the truth room with you." She crossed her arms indignantly and stared away from him.

Deidara laughed lightly. "Okay un, Okay I'll play nice. I guess the Uchiha is.." he gagged out the next words as if tore at his soul to say it. "-Attractive, or something stupid chicks would say."

Sakura urged him to continue, waiting to hear more.

"Urgh, He's got stupid black hair and stupid black-blue eyes and I guess he dresses okay or whatever, can we please not talk about this anymore?!" He sounded truly pained, luckily (for Deidara at least) the door opened. Always forgetting that she could not see, Sakura's head whipped around to try to see who it was. "Deidara can we talk to you for a moment?"

It was Konan, and she sounded upset.

Grimly, Deidara rose to his feet. The expression on the blue haired woman's face telling him anything but good news.

"What going on?" Sakura asked standing up, looking this way and that. She heard whispering that she couldn't understand and then nothing. That was the worst part for Sakura, the silence left her with nothing, no clues about where to go, not help, no comfort, just cold dead silence.

"Deidara? Deidara what going on? What's wrong, you have to tell me! We're in the truth room!" The reason was silly and childish at best, she knew that, but it was all she could think of at the moment.

There was a sigh and someone took her hand and there was an artificial 'creeeeeeeek' sound. Looking up at whoever held her hand, she was almost certain it was Konan, Sakura asked what that was.

Too quiet for someone who was as bright and bubbly as Deidara, he answered. "I left the truth room." A moment later he left the actual room too.

---

Konoha wasn't coming to get her.

That was all she heard and that all that rang in head as she ran deeper and deeper into the forest. She must have tripped hundreds of times, her dress was dirty and torn, but she ran and ran.

_'Why?! Why wouldn't they come to get me? Doesn't anyone miss me? Mom? why won't you come save me?' _

Her feet carried her until they couldn't bare to take another step and she collapsed in a field of tulips, just past the edge of the ash trees.

'I am twelve years old today and No one is here to celebrate it with me.'

She is exhausted and passes out, only to be found a few minutes later, by her black haired captor who carries her back to the hideout where he treats her wounds and stays the entire night by the side of her bed. Itachi is gone the moment she awakens, and although she can not see a thing, Sakura knows he is the one who followed her from the thick scent of tulips that lingers next to her bed.

Tulips were his favorite, and they were hers as well.

----


	2. Part II: Amygdala

Air

Part II; Amygdala

By Chibi Ra Chan

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Tragedy

Pairing: ItaSaku

---

_Amygdala- the portion of the brain that is responsible for irrational thinking, the center of Emotion_

"_You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed."_

_-The Little Prince, chapter 21_

It was July, and Sakura had been with the Akatsuki for over four months.

Usually it was just the four of them, but every once and a while, others would come to tell them things about the state of Leaf. They would send her out of the room, having Deidara entertain her while their leader, a man with a deep rainy voice would update them on the situation.

Once a week she would ease drop on the conversation, desperate to hear any news of her home, but it soon became apparent that there would be no desperate rescue attempt.

Around the 6th week, she stopped listening to the meetings.

"You are quiet today Sakura." Itachi's lilting voice glided through the summer heat. They were in his garden, despite the humid temperature, she liked to sit there. To hear the rustle of the ash trees, to feel the earth under in fingers, to smell the carefully tended flowers all around her. "This is not like you."

This way, she could almost see things.

Sakura knew that he had stopped to look at her. She could feel it.

"Some kidnapper you are, leaving me in the open, I could easily run away while you are playing house with your flowers." She spit out. As childish as she knew it was, she wanted him to be a normal kidnaper sometimes.

He shouldn't tease her, or teach her how to plant whole tulip bulbs, or stay with her until she falls asleep. He wasn't playing his part right! She should not forget that she's the victim in all this.

If Itachi was affected by her harsh words then she couldn't tell. She had the feeling that even if she could see his face it would be just as impassive as his voice was.

"You would do no such thing."

Angrily she stood up, throwing her garden tool to the moist earth, and wiped the sweat off her wide brow in frustration. "You don't know that! You don't know anything about me!"

"I know a lot about you. You are Haruno Sakura. You dislike leeks; you are eleven years old but insist on acting like you are an adult. Your favorite flower is the tulip, and you hate cherry blossoms despite being named after them. You are growing your hair long because you think it hides your wide forehead. "

She shut her eyes to try to block the tears that were forming.

"And I also know you well enough to know that you aren't angry at me, you are really angry that Konoha has not inquired about you once since you were stolen from them."

Her breath hitched, he was right, Itachi was always right. But she refused to let him know that. She wanted nothing to do with him, she wanted to go home, and she wanted Konoha and her mother to want her to come home.

Didn't they miss her at all?

But Sakura was too young to understand that there was much then just her at stake here, there were hundreds of lives on the line. And she could not see that. All she could see was that because of this man and his friends she was far far away from home.

She didn't want him to be right about her home. "You don't understand anything! You-! I- I hate you!" And she ran, she ran not into the forest in escape, but into the house where she would be able to cry on her bed and wish that everything was normal again. That she could see and her mother was just her mother again, not a president. That in some way a boy who's' face she couldn't even see didn't know her better then everyone back home did.

----

"Cut it off."

Konan blinked and set down the paper crane she was creating.

For the most part of two days Sakura had been locked inside her room, only coming out to eat. She had learned that Sakura and Itachi had a tiff of sorts, and Sakura had refused to speak to the raven haired boy. To the untrained eye it would seem as if Itachi could care less. He was just as dispassionate as before, but she had known him since he was only thirteen, and she knew that he was on edge.

Whatever Sakura had said to him had upset him a great deal.

You can imagine her surprise when their little captive barged into her bedroom, demanding her to cut her hair.

"Sakura-chan, why would you want to cut it?" Konan, ever the peacekeeper in the house, asked calmly.

Following her voice with trained ease, the pinkette sat down in what she thought was in front of Konan. (In actuality it was her left side she sat down on, but I digress) Pulling out the hair band that kept the locks back, Sakura glared into nothing. "I don't want it anymore. I don't need it!"

The blue haired woman sighed. This had something to do with Itachi, she could tell. Itachi may have been a genius in some areas but it was always increasingly clear that handling little girls was not one of those areas.

"I thought you were going to grow it out?" Konan asked slightly exasperated.

To her credit, Sakura's pout increased only a little, her bottom lip jutting out even further. "If you won't do it, I'll do it myself. I don't want it anymore." Her green eyes glared blankly ahead, small arms crossed in frustration.

In this moment, Konan realized that they were in way over their heads. This entire plan hinged on Sakura being taken back by leaf, so that Akatsuki's leaders could barter for a peace policy with sound. But, somewhere along the way, it became less about peace and more about taking a little girl and forcing her to grow up too fast.

Leaf was not going to come for Sakura. They obviously weren't about to put the life of a single girl over that of potentially expanding their territory, even if it was the only child of their president.

And for their part all they had accomplished was kidnapping a little girl from her family and blinding her. They had grown attached to the loud pinkette, none more so then Itachi. It was in no way a secret that Sakura harbored quite a large crush on the former Uchiha, and he had some kind of affection for the child as well.

Eventually, she would leave them and what then? Her relationship with her mother would never be the same, and it was unlikely that she would be able to forgive the county for abandoning her. Her first love was bound to end in tragedy.

Sakura's life would never be the same.

Faced with the overwhelming truth of the actions that even she had a part in, Konan sighed. "How short are you talking Sakura-chan?"

---

It bothers him that she has avoided him.

He knows full well that it should not, she was just a means to an end, a way to make sure thousands did not die in a needless war. He should not let himself become attached to her, it was irrational and Uchiha Itachi was anything but irrational.

Yet he found himself acting out of instinct around Sakura. He just let his thought float out of his mouth, without analyzing the damage they could cause. It was a terrible habit that she had tricked him into picking up. Sometimes it drove him mad. Imagine him, a perfectly capable 17 year old, unable to hold his tongue in front of an eleven year old princess.

Other times though, it was liberating just to talk, to think out loud and to let go of the reigns of his carefully held control if only for a short time.

He is completely thrown off when a pair of milky pale arms wind themselves around his neck. Instinct told him to defend himself, that anyone that could sneak into his quarters with such ease was a threat to him, but the arms are not exuding any force, so he remains seated on the floor, and moves not an inch.

"You were right."

It is Sakura, she is the only one who could walk so silently. Four months without her vision had sharpened her other senses drastically. She heard everything that went on in the house, she could tell every scent perfectly, and she could walk without making a sound. It was no shock, she was a smart girl, but more then that, he knew she had no desire to have them take care of her.

She didn't want to be weak.

Which is why her demure, show of affection confused him.

She lays her cheek against his hair and closes her eyes, simply basking in the warmth of the day and his calming scent. "I'm sorry I yelled at you."

His posture is still painfully rigid, and he murmurs out a response. "It is not important."

He hears her sigh and feels her hug his head tighter so that it rests lightly on her chest. "It is important, I said I hated you. I acted like a child."

"You are a child." There he goes again, talking without thinking.

She laughed lightly and he feels it vibrate though her chest then he actually hears it. "If I'm a child then so are you."

The idea is laughable. He hadn't considered himself a child for years, and he is sure that there is a large difference in maturity between the two of them, leaving him older then his years, but he says nothing. She has let go of him and sits down next to him taking in the light breeze that the open veranda affords them. "I don't like fighting with you." Sakura says quite suddenly.

"Me neither." Itachi gets glimpse of her for the first time in several days and he can't stop the hand that reaches out to touch her chopped rose locks. "Why?"

She smiles sadly and look in his direction, he thinks awkwardly that her eyes are the exact shade of sea foam, and must be beautiful when they are not glazed over in mock-blindness. "You know so much about me, I didn't want you to be right about everything." This makes him smile. He was still right, her forehead was large, but it fit her features and one day she would grow into it.

"Itachi can I ask you something? You don't have to answer if you don't want to." Sakura bites her bottom lip, something he knows she only does when she's nervous.

"Aa." is his only answer, which she takes as 'sure, why not?'

"What happened to your brother?" Itachi promptly forgets how to breathe. "You mentioned him on my first day here but never since."

His heart beat wildly against his ribcage. He had stupidly brought up Sasuke all those weeks ago, and now he was paying the price. Did he want to tell her? No, he didn't want to ever think about it. It was much to painful and even he had his hidden secrets to be kept. She wouldn't think the same of him if he told her. He hated himself because of what happened, would she hate him as well?

"Why do you want to know?"

Sakura's answer was immediate. "I want to know you just as well as you know me."

He didn't speak for a long time and it seemed as if he would never say a word, but sure enough just as she began to rise he opens the closet and let the skeletons fall out.

"His name is Sasuke and he'll turn twelve in a few days"

He watches as she sits down again, head bowed in a posture he recognizes as her listening intently. He steels himself and continues.

"Our family were merchants in Konoha for many generations. In more recent years under my father's control, they began illegal trade with Rain country. Sasuke was only a toddler when this started and never really knew about all that was going on.

I tried to convince my father to stop the trading with Rain. The president at the time, a man named Namikaze Minato and his wife had been assonated a few weeks before and Rain was the main suspect. I knew that if we were found to be trading with them, our lives would be ruined, not to mention there was a high risk of being put to death for treason.

I thought that if I could simply reason with my father then we could stop the dealings before it complicated things any further. I was wrong. My families ties to Rain ran much deeper then trade. A member of the family, Madara had been the one to order the assassination of the president and his family. He held some kind of grudge over something called the 'Kyuubi Project' I still don't know much about it. Just that Madara was the one who made it look like Rain had caused their death.

He wanted to start a war with Rain and take the position of president himself."

Sakura gasped, they had never told her any of this back in Konoha because it was a heavily guarded secret, likely her mother knew of the events but had never told her daughter. She was too innocent to know of such things, the dark side of politics, the side that she now was deeply engrossed in. It was such a cruel heartless thing. He didn't have the heart to tell her that no one but the highest up in her mother's cabinet knew she was even missing.

It would break her fragile heart.

"I found all of this out and ran to the military police of Konoha. I told them only about Madara, but they saw the entire clan as a threat, maybe they were. I never really knew how deep Madara's influence was over the rest of them. They detained me for weeks under questioning. I was tortured but I never had anything to do with the misdoings of the clan, I was just trying to save lives." His voice cracked. This was the first time he had spoken the complete story to anyone. The unwanted memories flooded in and he found himself unable to stop the tremors that racked his body. "I didn't want anyone to get hurt."

"How old were you?" Her voice was thick and strained like she had trouble speaking the words.

"I was thirteen at the time." He ignored her gasp and went on, knowing that if he did not finish the story now, then he never would.

"When I was released, my family was gone. It was like they never existed, no one spoke of them, and no one questioned their departure. I knew they were dead. Mother, father, Shisui, everyone, dead. Madara however had escaped somehow, and he took Sasuke with him. I searched for a year trying to find him. He was the only person who had ever really wanted me around, who was genuinely happy when I came home.

I found him, but-" His shaking was violent now and he had to stop in order to collect himself, Itachi could feel Sakura staring at him, and he knew from experience that it upset her to see other hurt. The logical tactician side of him yelled for him to pull himself together, that the past was the past, that he did not break down in front of others. But Itachi was just so tired of keeping everything to himself, and she simply wanted to know more about him. Sakura would listen.

Later, he would kick himself for laying his burden on Sakura,a twelve year old captive who should never have met him, but the weight of her eyes urged him to go on, regardless of the ramifications.

"I found Sasuke, living in Sound country, but Madara had poisoned his mind. He blamed me for the death of the clan, Madara had told him that I had betrayed father, that I had opened negotiations with Rain and then went to the military police to cover my tracks and rid myself of the clan. He hated me, he even tried to kill me, foolish little brother." He traced the small scar on his collar absently. The wound hadn't hurt as much as the pure malice and hatred that caused it.

"I have not seen him since."

Without warning what-so-ever, a crying Sakura crawled into his lap, her hands gripped at his back tightly and she openly wept into his shoulder. She had no reason to cry over him, he was a stranger, her captor, an obstacle on her way home.

The pink haired girl wept like it was her own personal tragedy. She cried because he could not do so for himself and even when he told himself that she meant nothing to him, he knew it to be false. He was a 17 year old man being comforted by an overly emotional little kid. It was backwards in every sense of the word and his logic screamed that he has started something that would undoubtedly end horribly.

Even so he allowed himself to be cried over, to be held as his tremoring eventually stopped. And even until Sakura wore herself out and feel asleep against his tear stained shirt.

Itachi wasn't sure if he was ready for this kind of thing.

---

She surprises him again, a few days later.

"Why haven't they responded to the messages?" She asked while swinging her legs nervously on the bench. Her tone was light, a bare whisper, as if she didn't really want to hear the reasoning.

"I don't know. We did not expect this to go on for so long." Itachi's voice drifted over to her from where he sat at the base of one of the many ash trees that bordered his little garden. He often sat there when he had free time; it seemed to be his favorite place.

"Is-" She started but stopped short. Sakura stood walked toward the tree, her only guide being four months of practice and the slight shift in the shadows that she could barely see. Itachi made no move to help her, like the others always did. He let her figure it out for herself.

For that she was grateful. She didn't want to be useless.

When she narrowly missed walking into his out stretched feet she sat down beside him. "Is it because I'm not good enough?"

There was a moment of silence, which she knew was him thinking out his answer. She had been around Itachi long enough to know that he always thought everything out before he spoke.

"To people." He started slowly. "Nothing is ever good enough. Everyone wants to live and be happy, but once we get the things we want, we want more. We are never truly happy, because it is human nature to want more. Nothing is ever good enough forever." His voice drifted off, as if he was thinking about something else as he said these words.

Sakura wished that she could have seen his face, to see if it was as sad as his voice sounded. She decided to tell him a bit of her own sadness as well.

"Before my Mom became president, people would tell me how smart I was, how pretty I was. I always felt special but after,-" Though he said nothing, she knew he was listening attentively. "After she became president. It wasn't enough. I couldn't just be a smart kid; I had to be the smartest kid. I couldn't just be pretty I had to be the prettiest. So that people would support my mother. I tried, you know, I did but it was just so hard."

His palm came to rest on her head, as he sometimes did just to let her know that he was there. The silence between them was comfortable. It was warm, accompanied by a soft wind. Sakura quickly felt herself losing track of time.

"I sometimes think about being reincarnated." He spoke in a low whisper that she didn't know if he was talking to her, or too the wind. "I think I would want to come back as a tree. No one could judge me because I wasn't good enough. All I would be obligated to do is sit and breathe in air and I would be a good tree. That way I could be free."

And in this moment, under the ash trees, miles away from home, next to a boy that she had never actually seen, Sakura realizes that she is in love.

'_If you are going to be a tree, then I want to be the air that you breathe. I want to be the only thing that makes you good, the thing that make you whole.'_

---

A/N: For some reason my comments didn't show up in the first chapter, but such is life I suppose. This is a first for me, were I actually completely finish a story and then post the chapters. It's working out pretty well though. I'm very very concerned about how people are reacting to this. It's my first time writing such an totally AU plot, so please drop in a review and tell me what you think!

Forever and Eternally,

-Ra


	3. Part III: Apnea

Air

Part III; Apnea

By Chibi Ra Chan

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Tragedy

Pairing: ItaSaku

---

_Apnea- The process in sleep where one stops breathing. The complete lose of air._

"_-But in herself alone she is more important than a hundred thousand roses: Because it is she I have listened to, when she grumbled or boasted, or even sometimes when she said nothing. Because she is my rose."_

_-The Little Prince, chapter 21_

It was the dead of winter. She had been with Itachi and the Akatsuki for nine long months.

In all honesty, she had trouble remembering what her room in the capitol looked like, but she knew that there were five walls in her room her and that her fluffy bed was against the fifth and smallest wall next to the paper screen door.

She could not remember what her birthday dress, the one she had picked out almost a year ago for her twelfth birthday party, felt like, but she knew the shape and texture of every single flower in the garden. She could tell a chrysanthemum from a sunflower with a single brush of the fingers.

She could just barely remember the perfume her mother would always wear, but she knew that Konan smelt like the sea, even though there wasn't a beach for miles. That Deidara smelt dry and musty from the clay he constantly played with. And that Itachi smelt like a fresh breeze, the earth after a strong storm, and fresh snow all rolled into one if that made any sort of sense at all.

To Sakura, these things meant the entire world.

It did not matter that Sakura was forced to come here, stolen from her family on the first official day of spring last year. It held no sway that the people who had taken her were now idolized in her non-seeing eyes.

It meant nothing that her first love was a man she had never seen with her actual eyes. She was not stupid by any means. She had long since figured out how they had blinded her, it was in the food. That's why they had been so worried when she didn't eat.

The food, some mildly spicy herb that she could taste in everything she ate, that was how they kept her seeing there faces. Sometimes the dosage would be a little less than normal, usually when Deidara was the one who had to feed her, and she could see in blurry lines and colors.

It never lasted long but, each time she would run through the house and try to find Itachi, praying he was around so she could get a glimpse of him. The moments when she could make out pale skin of a lanky body, dark hair, and strangely enough purple fingernails where moments that she treasured above all else.

Sakura was in way over her head, she knew it. She should have been waiting to go home, she should have been longing to see her mother again, to play with Naruto, to bug Shizune into giving her candy, But she wasn't.

The things that had made up her life for the last eleven years didn't matter anymore. The people who spent each and everyday with her, who talked to her like an adult not as a child, those were the people that mattered. Itachi mattered.

That's why when there was subtle whisper in the farthest corner of the house; she bolted from her bead and ran with in unusually loud steps into the surrounding forest.

Something was going to happen, and Sakura knew in her heart of hearts that nothing would ever be the same again.

---

He finds her in farthest end of the garden. He had known the moment she had slipped out of her room, with light precise steps.

Sakura was crying, like she had when she had first tried to run away. Then she had been eleven years old, in a pretty, overly ruffled dress with long pink hair that made her stick out like a sore thumb.

Now she was three months shy of her thirteenth birthday, wore the most simple of dresses, and while her hair still made her stick out like a sore thumb, it was short and framed her heart shaped face.

Sakura had changed in these long nine months, but then again, so had he.

"I don't want to go back. Does that make me a bad person?" Even though she was blinded, her sea foam green eyes looked straight at him, piercing him to his place.

"You have to go back, you know this. You will go home when Konoha-" He repeated the words that had been engraved into his brain since the plan was hatched out. It was familiar, if not uncomfortable to say the words so much, but like she often did, she cut him off before he could finish.

"Not that! Not the house! I'm talking about Konoha. I- I don't want to go back there. I want to stay here. And I know it's bad- I shouldn't want to stay here, I have a life in Konoha, my mother's there, I have a- a room I can't even remember and -" she started crying even harder.

Awkwardly, he knelt in front of her, as if he wasn't quite sure of what he was going to do, but that was quickly erased by Itachi's usual confidence.

Smiling lightly to himself, Itachi poked her in the forehead. Her head shot up at the unfamiliar action.

"Foolish little girl. You're not a bad person. Children are allowed to be selfish."

Sakura shook her head, hair flailing about. "I'm not supposed to be selfish. I'm supposed to be a model little girl. I just…" She trailed off non-seeing eyes turning away from his voice and into the trees.

He was afraid of this, he had known since she stopped asking about her mother and leaf. He knew that something had gone terribly amiss. Sakura had become too attached to this place, to him. "Why would you want to stay here? A few months ago all you wanted was to go home."

"I don't know, I just, I want to stay here. You guys get me. I don't know! I just do okay? I want to stay and listen to Deidara complain about everything, I want Konan to teach me how to make paper cranes, I want to be able to see you, with my own eyes. I want you to-" She stopped speaking reaching out blindly; grabbing onto his loose shirt and hugging him with all the strength she could muster.

"I want to stay with you forever, with all my heart. You don't think I'm stupid for wanting to stay right? You understand, don't you?" She was crying now, soaking the front of his shirt with salty tears. Itachi's eyes softened. It was never a good idea to involve a child in this. Sakura was too young, too smart to not get confused, to become attached.

Itachi sighed, and returned her embrace "Yeah, I understand." And maybe he was too young to deal with this either.

"Let's return." He spoke softly into her pink hair releasing her from his embrace, she didn't budge, her fingers only curled deeper into his shirt. "Sakura, we need to get back, Konan will be worried."

"Stay, just stay." Her unseeing green eyes bore into him, imploring him to listen.

Itachi manages to pull himself from her grip, and looks her over with mild irritation. "I am not going to leave you alone Sakura, you have nothing to-"

In the distance an explosion was heard and the night was suddenly filled his yelling and screaming, the air was thick with blood and smoke. He immediately put the pieces together. It was an attack from Konoha, they were here to crush them, they never had any intention of bargaining for Sakura, they were going to take her by force.

Konan and Deidara stood no chance on their own, they would find the location of the others and then there wouldn't be the slightest hope for peace. They would die, and if he had stayed there with them, so would he.

Obsidian eyes widened as the little girl who clutched at his arm, the only thing that was keeping him from running into the fray to help his comrades, the little girl that couldn't see a single thing, but could hear a pin drop across the house. She was crying harder then ever and her grip on his wrist was strong. "You-You knew, you heard. You tried to save me."

She didn't deny it.

Itachi smiled despite the horribleness of the situation. She had lured him out to find her, knowing that there wouldn't have been time to wake all the others and even if she had Konan would stay, to protect Pein and Deidara wouldn't run like a coward. Sakura knew that only he would come to find her.

She loved him and tried to change his fate.

He was going to die in this battle.

Using the hand that wasn't being clutched, Itachi patted her head, smoothing down the short pink hair that blew around wildly in the wind, at once she looked up even if she couldn't see him. "Itachi?"

"Don't cry. Good kids don't cry."

"But I-" Sakura's word died the moment she felt his lips touch her forehead softly.

"Thank you Sakura, You made these months very special. I thought that since I'd lost Sasuke I wouldn't be able to love anyone ever again, but you proved me wrong." He pried her small pale fingers from his hand. She didn't move to grab him again, she just stared straight a head, tears falling onto the forest floor.

_'Please don't go. Stay with me, I love you, Itachi. Please don't leave me, my heart can't bare it.'_

"I'm sorry I won't get to see you in your birthday dress, I was looking forward to it." With that he pushed a pressure point at the base of her neck as gently as he could. Instantly her legs gave out on her and he caught the delicate pink bundle with the utmost care. Itachi placed her against one of the many ash trees, and covered her with his jacket.

It hurt more then it should have to leave her there, he knew she'd be found soon enough, yet knowing that did not lessen the pain in his heart. It was like losing his brother all over again, only this time there would be someone left to deal with the mess he'd caused. Sakura was the first person who had ever honestly loved him, completely and wholey even when she knew everything he had done wrong in his life.

Itachi smiled bitterly as he ran toward the hideout. He had meant what he said, and it took all of his will power not to turn back and steal Sakura away. Away from her own people, the war that would erupt, the sadness, away from everything that would hurt her. But he knew from experience that running wouldn't fix anything. and neither would challenging fate.

Once, they talked about reincarnation, about living multiple lives. Maybe somewhere, somehow, in another life he could have watched her grow into a beautiful young woman, maybe he could have kept her from seeing such pain and suffering in this life, maybe she really could have been the air that he breathed, maybe she could have saved him, maybe they'd have actually have stood a chance at being happy.

_'Maybe...'_ He only allowed himself to look back at her once before rushing head first into the brawl. _'Maybe we can meet again in the next life Sakura?'_

No, he definitely wasn't ready for this sort of thing.

---

A/N: Ugh, it killed me to write this chapter, it's so sad and the melancholy hit home. I'm rather proud of this chapter though. And there is only one more chapter remaining!

Please take the time to review, they always warm my heart.

Forever and Eternally,

-Ra


	4. Part IV: Apple

Air

Part IV; Apple

By Chibi Ra Chan

Rating: T

Genre: Romance/Tragedy

Pairing: ItaSaku

---

_Apple; as in 'Apple of One's Eye' -__one that is highly cherished, a precious person._

_"It was wrong of you to come. You will suffer. I shall look as if I were dead; and that will not be true, you understand. It is too far. I cannot carry this body with me. It is too heavy. But it will be like an old abandoned shell. There is nothing sad about old shells..."_

_-The Little Prince, chapter 26_

_---_

I woke up what seemed like days later. I'm in bed, but it is not my bed. No, my bed at the base is low to the floor, and wasn't so springy. For I minute I think that I fell asleep in Konan's room again and I call out to her. But there isn't the smell of the ocean, and the acoustics of the room were all wrong.

I opened my eyes and instantly wanted to cry, I could see. And it couldn't have made me more miserable. If I could see then that meant I was back in Konoha, back home, but somehow it didn't seem right at all. I cried out for Itachi, screamed for him but he was no where to be found.

My mother rushed into the room, she smelt the same as before, her hair was the exact shade of honey yellow that I remembered. Mama hugged me tightly, kissed me over and over and again, apologized for everything and cried, which was something I never remember seeing her do before.

I was weeping too but for completely different reasons. I tried to push her away but she would have known of it. I spent the day crying with my mother. She cried because I was home after so long, because I had grown two inches while I was gone, because my hair was short, because I had started to turn into a young woman with out her being able to watch as it happened.

I cried because I knew they were dead, because now I would never know how to make paper flowers, because I had never finished making a single clay bird, because I had never gotten to see my first love. I cried because I would give away my newly returned eyesight forever if I could just hear Itachi's voice one more time.

Time passed slowly, and after a week or so of being home I dared to ask about the fate of the 'captors.'

My mother didn't want to tell me, but her secretary Shizune told me anyway. The two that had been there had been killed, but not before sending a bird to tell their leader to flee. Pein still lived and he still worked toward his idea of peace. I didn't like the man, but it made me happy that Deidara and Konan had at least gotten to save their important person. I asked about a third person, and was told that he had been killed protecting the messenger bird, an arrow through the heart.

At least he died in his garden.

I never asked again.

Everything reminded me of him, the snow that fell during my recovery, the winds that came in the spring and the wet earth after a harsh storm. For the longest time the soft padding of feet on the bare floor made my heart flutter, only to crash when it was Naruto coming to visit.

My birthday came and passed with no celebration. I wouldn't wear a fancy new dress, I wouldn't eat cake and there was no grand party. I sat in my room, with my eyes closed and tried to imagine what it was like one year ago. When I woke up to the smell of tulips and three carefully placed flowers on my pillow. Konan had told me that they had been the ripest, brightest tulips that Itachi had in his garden, the deepest shade of red imaginable.

I was thirteen years old and I felt like I had lived forever.

Soon, I couldn't shut myself in my room any longer. I had to go back to the world of the living. It was amazing; no one had even known I had been missing. They had thought that I was off on a trip, spending time with my godfather Kakashi in some remote country for nearly a year. No one knew that I had been blinded or that I had fallen in love and lost my best friend.

After awhile it started to seem like a dream to me too.

It was only the fleeting scent of sweet rain and the dreams of a faceless boy gardening, patting my head, shaking in my arms, kissing my forehead that let me know that it was no dream.

Days turned to weeks and weeks turned to months with faded into years and one not so very special day, I went to my window and to my surprise a small tree was sprouting in the sweet earth. A single leaf grew from the top on the tree-ling; which only reached my waist.

I cried, but it was not in sadness. It was in happiness. He had said that he wanted to come back as a tree; I had no doubt that this dinky little tree, which grew amongst my small tulip garden, was the product of Itachi's hope.

It would be an ash tree I was sure of it.

This was Itachi, a part of him at least. The part that wanted to be cherished and live on in a world of peace, I like to think that it's also the part of him that loved me.

And I knew what I had to do.

---

_I adjust my dress, making sure it has no creases and pulling at the deep red fabric. I fight the urge to run back to the car, where Naruto was waiting, just in case. Mom has no idea that I'm here, and it's strangely liberating to act like a normal sixteen year old and lie to your mother about where you're going._

_Honestly it was just one day._

_I take a deep breath and smooth my short hair in place, before knocking on the door. Rustling can be heard inside and I wonder if I can handle this._

_The door opens and the face that answers does nottear my heart in two like I thought it would. Sure there was black hair and dark eyes, but nothing ever match the blurry silhouette of Itachi, nothing could compare._

_I tilt my head to the side slightly, "Uchiha Sasuke....?" He nods warily. "This is a bit odd I know, but do you think we could talk for a bit? Someone I know had something very important he never had a chance to tell you." He looks skeptical, but he opens the door none the less._

_I think of the ash tree back at home growing, breathing in the same air that I am, and it is enough to help me take that next step._

_-Owari-_

_---_

Note: Wow, that was a hard one to write. And Honestly, the last part with Sasuke was totally spurr of the moment. i never planned to have him in the story, but I guess he invited himself. Anyways, this has been an extremely interesting story to write and although I have posted this story over the course of about 10 days, I have been writing it for over 4 months. It was a labor of love.

To the few people who have been reading and reviewing, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. You have made my life happy with your kind words. Please leave me a review and tell me how you liked, or didn't like, the ending of this story.

Forever and Eternally,

-Ra


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